The Story of Our *FREE* Piano...

“Happiness often sneaks in a door you did not think was open.”

One year ago, Isla and I went to check out a FREE used piano posted on craigslist. It was a belated birthday present to celebrate a year of her taking lessons! Our whole rambunctious family went along for the drive, but only Isla and I were tasked with going inside so we wouldn't overwhelm the current owners. We found our way to their cozy home in Minneapolis. As we proceeded into their family room, we received an unexpected and joyful greeting from their four-legged family member, Lola. A sweet 2-year-old mini goldendoodle! Isla went gaga over her (of course :) Eventually, we did look at the piano, play it a little, and decide it was a keeper! We drove away with a plan to schedule professional piano movers. We also drove away thinking about that pup...

I thanked the family again via text message, arranged a piano pickup date, and then... hesitantly asked where they adopted Lola. I surprised myself with this inquiry since we weren’t planning to get a puppy, and historically, I was the stop gate in all “can we get a dog?” conversations. Isla had petitioned for a pet for years, even questioning, “How am I supposed to be a veterinarian when we don’t have any animals?!?”

Lola’s mom eagerly provided her breeder information. Then, only a few days later, she sent me information about a brand new litter. She knew this because she was driving home from the breeder after picking out a puppy (from a different litter) to surprise her family for Christmas!

Fast forward to New Year’s Day, and we were again taking a family drive... this time down to Rochester to visit the 3-week-old litter. Oh my cuteness! It was hard to back out then. One smaller pup ventured out of the huddle and approached my slightly intimidating husband, Hannes. After he picked her up, she proceeded to lick his face. And just like that, we knew who our next family member was going to be! Meet Kona.

We joyfully welcomed her home mid-February.

Looking back, it all happened SO fast and unexpected!

Unlike our Kona story, it seems that many of the fast and unexpected scenarios this year have been very challenging and downright heartbreaking. Our heavy hearts have needed to grieve. The losses have been overwhelming at times. Perhaps you've still been able to find some silver linings in all of it.

My hope with sharing this story is to remember that some of the most joyful situations also stem from the fast and unexpected. A free piano turning into a puppy?!? Why not hope for the best in 2021? Let's dream big. ;)

Kona and I wish you health, peace, and lots of serendipitous joy in the year ahead!

You are gLOVED

2020 is really challenging and teaching me to see the best in people even (and especially) when they’re at their lowest. Including myself. Of course, it’s not a one and done lesson learned…

A couple days ago it was abnormally and wonderfully warm in Minnesota. I went for a run and got too hot wearing my gloves and neck buff. Usually I would just take them off and carry them, but my plan was to do an out-and-back, so I figured I could just drop them near a park bench and pick up on the way back. As I was setting them down, I had a feeling I might not see them again…

Sure enough, the black gloves were gone when I got back. They weren’t designer fashion, but they weren’t throwaways either. At first, I was surprised and a little annoyed. It had only been 30 minutes! Then again, hadn’t I anticipated this? I prayed that whomever grabbed them would get good use out of them. (The colorful buff was still there. Perhaps a little too sweaty?)

The next day I went out running again this time choosing not to wear gloves (two days in a row above 45!) Mid-run I thought, hmm… my hands are a little cold. So I got to thinking about those gloves again. And how I was thankful they were there for someone when they needed them.

Sometimes it’s hard for people who need help to actually seek assistance. This can be true for all needs: mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical. In this case, I know there are places folks can get free or affordable winter gear. And I know there are amazing food shelters, but maybe it’s hard for some people to: 1) admit they need it 2) know where to go 3) actually get there. So, that sparked an idea: you are gLOVED.

A few years ago I saw a FB post where people would hang up hats and gloves in parks. I don’t remember all the details, but I still have a clear mental visual of the gloves hanging on a fence. We decided to do a variation of it. The kids and I washed up extra gloves and buffs in our house, made heart notes, and printed off food shelf flyers. My husband went and bought some granola bars, and we created little care packs.

Yesterday we distributed them in two of our biggest local parks. The food shelf event is happening today (although they host them routinely), so we’re hoping these get into the hands of some folks that can make use out of it. Included in care pack:

• Gloves • Buff • 2 granola bars • Food shelf flyer • Handmade note

We’ll keep you posted on how it goes. Our plan is to return to these same sites in a couple days to see if they were used. We’ll pick them up if they were not and redistribute them as needed. A bit of an experiment. Please join us if you feel inspired!

#youaregloved #kindnessexperiment #youareloved #carepacks #foodshelf #mamawins #mamawinsproject

A Beacon of Hope

After typing most of this up a few days ago, I set it aside. Unsure of whether or not to post... My hope is that it's helpful for others, but with sensitive memories the retelling always feels incomplete. What if it gets misinterpreted? What if I forget a critical detail? But then I remember, the message will resonate with those that need it most. And that’s really what matters. So, if you’re reading this, I guess I decided that it was worth sharing ____________ Jan 30, 2016 [The night before an ultrasound and subsequent miscarriage.] I was crying in bed. Although not yet confirmed, I anticipated the days ahead and the emotional and physical pain were setting in. Isla laid down next to me bringing with her blanket and stuffed elephant. She gently stroked my face and hair and snuggled up. Such a warm, loving presence. At one point Isla put her ear to my belly and said, “She doesn’t want to die. She loves you too.” [even though we didn’t know gender yet] Then she added, “There will be another baby.” In that moment, it was hard to see beyond the pain. Those same words coming from an adult might not have sat well, but coming from a 4-year-old, they were a little glimmer of hope that helped sooth.

As it turns out, she was right. Tommy came along less than a year later.

When I was pregnant with him, I had a lot of anxiety about miscarrying again. Around 10 weeks I was especially worried because my morning sickness started to subside. It might sound weird but the early nausea had been comforting. A reminder that things were different inside me… life was growing. One morning I called my mom to talk through some of my concerns. Isla overheard what was being said. She quickly ran over to her doctor kit, found the stethoscope, put it to my belly, looked up and said, “I can hear the heartbeat, mom!” Not a hesitation or doubt in her voice. It was the assurance I needed to make it a couple more weeks before seeing the midwife.

All that plus A LOT of prayer.

There were similar instances during this time period, but I wanted to share these two memories because many of us are going through some unexpected times right now. Things aren’t going “as planned,” or maybe we’ve stopped planning all together. Anxiety and grief might be rolling in. At least that’s how I felt a few weeks ago: Mentally stuck in the mud and struggling to find traction. I am feeling much better now and one of the things that helped was reflecting on past challenges and recalling the healing process.

I am reminded that it’s especially helpful to talk through your feelings with someone (a loved one or a professional). One phone call goes a long way.

Allow yourself to fully grieve losses, but still have hope, faith, and a vision for the future. We can make it through hardship. We’ve done it before.

Lead with prayer and lean on others for support. Friends and family want to help. They do. I’m not sure if Isla is especially intuitive or if she’s just a great visionary. Her steadfastness was a beacon for me.

There will indeed be joy, awe, and laughter down the road (and actually sprinkled in along the way!) These golden moments are always there if we keep an eye out for them.

Continue to speak your heart, seek answers, and trust your instincts. And know that you are never EVER alone. Maybe physically bound, but, in spirit, your support structure is limitless.

Thinking of you all and sending big, warm hugs! PLEASE reach out if you want to chat.

______________ P.S. I should note that I often write as a reminder to my future self, too… even to read an hour, day, or years in the future. Writing is also a helpful healing tool